It's the kind of dream that makes your heart feel like it weighs 200 pounds. sobbing, wondering, Where Do I Go? Where Have I Come From? I can't stop. I must go on and on. To what end? The people pass by. I think I know them. I think I must have been hurt by them before. Or maybe it was I that did the hurting. Why are they so empty, while my heart is so full? Why won't they touch me? I reach, I fall, I walk some more. WAIT! WAIT! What can I do for you? Please look into my hands. There's something here for you, if only you'd take the time to find it. Turn it INSIDE OUT! And then what? It grows dark and hideous. It surrounds me and I suffocate. My fingers digging the holes out once more. Why won't they SPEAK? I cannot read minds. Only faces. And gestures. And I can read the lines of your brow, gently folding into your scalp. Where is it going? Why do you hate me? I'm the only one who truly loves you. And you put yourself in me so that I cannot get it out. I'm stuck with it, and I cry. The gravity I'm fighting is beginning to win. It pulls me into the incestuous mud. I gasp. I laugh. I'm awake. Now leave me alone.

© Monica Neumann