It’s only a word. It’s just a jumble of letters with a representative sound. How can something so insignificant as some squiggles on a page (or a screen) cause so much trouble? After all, words can only have the meaning we give them and nothing more. So what’s the big deal about this one? Personally, I could take it or leave it — I have no real use for it myself. That is why I say, let them have it. If it means so much to them, it’s theirs!

Who is “they”, and what is this word? Let me answer the simpler part first: marriage. The first part is not so cut-and-dried, but I have a solution. It seems to me that the people who hold on to this word tightest in our country are, generally-speaking, affiliated with some religious organization. At least they are the ones who seem to be the most invested in keeping this word to themselves, unwilling to share it with those who don’t comply with their ideal. So give it to them.

Let’s collectively define “marriage” as a religious institution, sanctioned by the state, giving those involved in the union all the benefits and responsibilities as a civil union, aka domestic partnership. Let the state decide who can be bound by a civil union, and let each faith decide who can be bound by a marriage. Two birds, one stone.

Listening to most arguments against allowing gay marriage, it seems to me most are faith-based. And this, to me, is just plain ridiculous. I wonder how many straight marriages in the US are between two people with any real religious conviction? Surely, it can’t be all. Can we say for sure that all marriages performed by Elvis impersonators, justices of the peace, or ship captains were performed while invoking the Almighty? I’m sure atheist couples don’t imagine their weddings are under the eyes of God.

However, if it will soothe their souls, let them have ownership of the word marriage. Let’s have a compromise so that all can have the freedom to legally bind themselves to another person. Let everyone else have domestic partnership—it’s got more letters, anyway. (Right now, in Washington State, only same-sex partners and couples with at least one member aged 62 or over can enter into domestic partnerships. How fair is that?)